The Hobby Habit Stack

using hobbies to build community and strengthen relationships

Photo by Nguyễn Hiệp on Unsplash

Hi sweet friends!

I have the smallest amount of free time to write right now (big thanks to my husband!), and I had this idea on my heart I wanted to share.

As a mom (and just an adult in general), I often feel frustrated that I have so many creative ideas and goals but never enough time to do it all. 8 hours of sleep, time with God/husband/kids, cooking good meals, being involved in family/church/community, working out, having hobbies, keeping the house clean, etc., etc. I have echoed this sentiment before and was met with many people who felt the same.

That is why I love a good habit stack! I am not the kind of person who has my hand in several things; I like to do a few things well. What I lack in breadth, I try to make up for in depth. So when I consider what I’m going to integrate into my life and where my time and energy go, I like to find things that can serve multiple goals or areas of my life instead of just one.

I love Substack for this reason: it has been a hobby that has fed my soul; it has brought friendship in a time when community was sparser; it has drawn me closer to God through its content; and so on.

So, for this little article, I wanted to offer a reframe for you to consider!

I’ve been really trying to pursue hobbies over the last 2 years so I could find things I like as an individual, and things to do with my husband, my kids, and as a family.

The world often pushes for moms to have hobbies as a means of self-care, which is important, yes, but I want to offer the reframe of hobbies as soul-care.

Lately, I've been trying to find ways to connect more with friends, church, and community, and to model that for my kids, while also making time to invest in the things I like after years of putting a little too much focus on being ‘mom’.

So I looked at what I was currently doing and how I could make my hobbies more relational.

I am currently loving knitting. I have made one or two things for my kids, but I have a few friends who are pregnant, so why not use that time to knit them a baby blanket?

I’ve been loving watercolor and letter writing (a hobby my oldest is developing alongside me!). Why not use the time together with my oldest when the toddler naps to paint watercolor cards that can be used to make birthday cards, thank-you cards, or encouraging notes for neighbors and friends?

I have been loving plants and growing zinnias; why not propagate some of my plants to give as small gifts, or use the zinnias as decor for our house instead of buying bouquets at the store and letting my kids make arrangements to drop off at a nursing home or give to neighbors?

These are all ideas I have had buzzing around in my mind for some time. It actually started with the zinnias! I knew a few months ago that, given how much my kids and I love flowers, it would be cheaper to grow some for our home, and what fun it would be to give them to others (but they are still growing, and I’m so impatient, haha).

This little reframe has made it so much sweeter to engage in hobbies. While it does feed my soul, having a purpose behind some of my hobbies (but not all) has made it easier to rest.

While some hobbies have more outward benefits, like Pilates for my physical health or listening to books and sermons while on a walk for my spiritual health, I have felt it harder to do other hobbies that turn my brain off because they feel frivolous. Reframing it as a means of soul care that brings me closer to Christ and community has been key to making room for what matters most.

While the world focuses more on pushing us to do what WE think best serves US, rooting things back in Jesus and reframing things through a biblical lens makes everything click so much more.

God had a perfect design for us and for the world. A perfect design for purposeful work and peaceful rest.

And the beautiful thing is this:

The more we pursue God’s design, the more our lives begin to align.

If you have found it hard to rest in your hobbies, what are some ways you can reframe them as a means of soul-care this week? I’d love to know!

Love,

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